11/12/12

It’s strange how fast the hours of the day pass while the darkness encloses the present.

I think about the people who have touched my heart.

Those who I hurt and those who have hurt me back.

I listen to songs that I always connect with a distant yet direct memory or sentiment.

I’m not ashamed to say that I’m scared.

I’m scared that my life will pass and I won’t live it to my fullest potential.

I think about how fragile human relationships are.

How being young is hard.

How being old is hard.

How being human is generally hard.

Thoughts of those who are unfortunate arise and I catch myself feeling guilty.

I think about love, friendship and the experiences that have occurred and that will occur in the future.

How we want to believe that we will be with a person forever or how we want to believe that once we have found that special someone, everything in life will suddenly become easier to deal with.

No one knows where this journey will take us and we have to be grateful that we are here, regardless of the conditions.

Sometimes that scares me though – not knowing what will happen.

I remember constantly feeling worried about a situation or a loved one. I used to fear change so much - it used to interfere with my comfort zone.

I used to worry that I could never feel as good as I did then. But then I thought that I didn’t know that I was going to feel as I did at that specific moment up until I actually took the risk, viewed the circumstances and experienced what it was I experienced.

It has been difficult to accept change as a part of life but sometimes I guess you have to in order to move on, let yourself go and give a chance at whatever comes your way.

I still have so much to learn and feel.

I hope I can still say the same in years to come.

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