I saw a girl in my dreams a few times over the course of three weeks. This is so strange
The intimacy and familiarity I felt were eerie and comforting at the same time
Just like when you open a book and continue reading it from the same place you left it.
This girl still holds a place in my heart even if we don't talk too often.

I saw some dreams these past few weeks where we were just talking, teasing each other with smart comments and being cheeky with one and other - simply because we could.
All of these dreams ended in us eventually sleeping together and it was kind of like.. innate?
It felt so natural and there was so much eye contact and an "animalistic flow" of some kind.

I miss that feeling of love and mutual respect; that feeling of holding someone in your arms and wanting to protect them, to reach a level of personal "atonement" and to respect their being for everything they were born with and everything they may grow to be.

I miss the feeling of touching someone and making them know that their body is sacred; that their fears and dreams are valid and that it is acceptable, in that moment, for them to feel whatever they need to because they made the first move, they opened up and made themselves vulnerable.


It is not about looking at that person as fragile or unable to defend themselves.. and it is not about seeing myself as a "replacement" or reminder of their worth or even a submissive entity for that matter (not that there's anything wrong with that!). I just find it so.. overwhelming how humans interact and how our capabilities can offer us so much gratification if we knew when to compromise, if we were braver or even if we behaved as truthfully as we could.


Copyright © M.E.S.