26/01/11

Wednesdays were always tiring. Ever since the school schedule changed, it has become more tiring. Ah, well.

I sometimes feel like there are so many thoughts running through my head and I can’t express them onto paper. Either that, or I feel too emotionally awestruck to do so. It wasn’t like that last year, though. I think that it’s due to the fact that I think a lot more before I open my mouth to express anything, really. I analyze quite often and too much sometimes and it’s sort of scaring me.

I wanted to go to this gathering at a cafe in town today at seven but I figured that I’d be behind in my lessons if I decided to go. At the gathering, there would probably be a documentary about the revolution of capital(maybe even discuss about capitalism?) and there would be a discussion about it afterward. I mentioned the gathering to my Mom and she said that I shouldn’t be interested in these things at this age. I didn’t know how to take that exactly..I mean, lots of people my age are unwillingly thrust into a field of knowledge and need to be informed about a diversity of things. I’m interested in things like these, though(probably due to the analyzing I mentioned earlier).

I sometimes wonder if I should keep a personal blog. A blog where I’m anonymous. There have been times where I’ve wanted to go over my day and write it down somewhere but I get held back because, even though I may not personally or directly know any of my followers, I still feel this eerie urge to keep things to myself.

On Monday, I had this lesson which, when translated in English is something along the lines of the word ‘Justice’. Well, in this lesson, we’re informed about the meaning of politics and political systems throughout the world and are given examples.

There was this statement in the book that me and this classmate of mine didn’t fully comprehend and asked our teacher to clarify and possibly give an example. He started off by saying that his example would cause an uproar from my classmate and he continued by saying : "One example I could give you is gay marriage. 90% of the Greek population is against it."

He has shown his disapproval towards this minority many times in class and lots of students-including myself- have said things that go into contrast with his beliefs.

Well, on Monday, two of my classmates and I were having a heated conversation about homosexuality. One of my classmates is a great guy but can have quite “traditional” values and beliefs depending on how he was brought up(his dad and grandfather have professions that are directly related to the church). He always manages to break the ice and put a smile on someone’s face even when he’s doing something simple such as the way he stares at someone. Anyway, while he was making a statement about homosexuality, he joked that they can’t reproduce and that it’s not normal. Many people laughed at this.

My other classmate is more open minded. She’s generally quite informed about societal problems and such and was disagreeing to what my previous classmate was saying by presenting her own examples.

When things were going out of hand in class due to the shouting, I read this passage in our book out loud(I knew my loud voice would come in handy someday haha) while everyone else fell silent. I read these exact words : "Εveryone has the right to develop their personality and to participate in societal, political and economical aspects of a community just as long as this act doesn’t disregard other people’s rights, the Conduct and morals in any way."

I read this to and looked at my teacher, waiting for any type of reaction or response. This was what he is teaching us, that’s what the book says and he is against it. Once I finished reading it he said : "you’re too young-once you grow older and become mature you’ll understand. Thirty years ago, political marriage was looked down upon but now it’s not. I look down upon gay marriage and I won’t see it any differently if society doesn’t."

Just then, one of my classmates(who wasn’t participating in the discussion already) said : "But, Sir, Marilena is already a mature person". I looked at her with a sympathetic glance and weakly smiled.

My classmates(the ones who I mentioned) said some other things concerning this topic. My guy classmate said something which bothered me and said that homosexuality wasn’t normal.. what is normal, anyway? A friend of mine and I were having a conversation in which she told me this exact same thing : ‘what is normal? A relationship that produces substance?’. It made me think. A relationship is something that is built on trust, honesty, friendship, understanding and most importantly love.

I turned my chair to face him and was referring to everyone in class when I said : "don’t homosexuals have feelings? Don’t they love? Don’t they get hurt? Aren’t they human, just like heterosexuals? How does a gay marriage, in any way, have any relevance and effect on your life? You’re not the one who wants to get married-it’s them."

My teacher got fed up. I’m not sure if it was because we lost almost all the lesson to discussing or if what I was saying bothered him.

What surprised me, though, is that two of my classmates(one of them was the girl who said that thing about me) came up to me and said that, even though they aren’t really for homosexuality, they liked the way I presented my ideas on the specific topic.

The classmate of mine, the boy, came up to me and said : "‘I’m sorry. I don’t want us to fight for homosexuals’", then hugged me. I apologized, too, for getting too worked up about it. But it is, nevertheless, a debated topic.

The thing is.. what I like about the group of people I am with at school is that..they may not agree with your ideas but they still make an effort and sometimes accept you for you and your whole package of ideas.

I feel relieved for speaking up for what I believe in and what I think had to be said(paradoxically during a lesson which is based on “justice”) after having thought about it(analyzing had been mentioned, right? Yup). I remember backing down countless times to this opportunity.

I think this post is quite huge. I just needed to let it out.

~Peace.

Αποδοχή

Αποδοχή. Συνώνυμη με την έγκριση, το σεβασμό.
Για ποιο λόγο περιμένεις αποδοχή; Να σε σώσει ο δογματισμός;
Aναμονείς τη μέρα που θα μπορέσω ελεύθερα να αγαπήσω;
Σπάνε οι φραγμοί που υπήρχαν αιώνια τριγύρω.
Μήπως υπήρχαν πρωτού αναδειχθεί το φαινόμενο;
Ή ήταν, τελικά, τόσο αναμενόμενο;
Ακόμα υπάρχουν αντιρρήσεις.
Από ποιούς και γιατί; Aπό οικογένεια, φίλους..ανθρώπους που ούτε καν έχεις γνωρίσει.
Πνευματικά τυφλοί και καθηλωμένοι, οπισθοδρομικοί και ανεξήγητα μετανιωμένοι.
<< Την αγάπη διέδωσε στο συνάνθρωπο >>, σου συμβουλεύουν,
μα οι ίδοι γιατί νομίζουν πως έχουν το δικαίωμα να σου την απαγορεύουν;
Το παράδοξο είναι πως διαδίδεσαι στα λόγια σαν επιδημία.
Στις πράξεις των ανθρώπων που σε χρησιμοποιούν, όμως, αποκαλύπτεται η προσωπική τους λεξιπενία.
Το μέλλον είναι απρόβλεπτο, υπάρχει η πιθανότητα να εκλείψεις.
Μην μ'αφήσεις μόνη μου, πάρε με μαζί σου εαν σκέφτεσαι να εγκαταλείψεις.

Τα πρώτα μου λόγια

Όντας άτομο στη ζωή δεκαέξι και χρόνια,

είναι ώρα να εκφράσω και εγώ τα πρώτα μου λόγια.

Που, πριν έρθεις είχαν ήδη σχηματιστεί,

απλώς χρειάστηκε την παρεμβολή σου ώστε να επιτευχθεί.

Συναισθήματα, χαμόγελα, γράμματα με βαθύτερο νόημα.

Περιπέτειες, συζητήσεις, μα πολύ περισσότερο γλυκές τύψεις.

Αστεία, έλξη, φράσεις που σε τρίτους χρειάζεται ιδιαίτερη σκέψη.

Περπάτημα, φύση, πολύ περπάτημα, που είναι η βρύση;

Ήρθες απρόσμενα και θέλω να μείνεις,

οι δυσκολίες είναι πολλές, το ξέρω, μα η καρδιά μου εκεί κλίνει.

Τα μάτια σου κρύβουν έναν κόσμο που επιθυμώ να γνωρίσω,

το βλέμμα σου δεν επιτρέπει το σώμα μου να μετακινήσω.

Τα λόγια σου δεν μου αφήνουν περιθώριο σκέψης και αναπνοής,

αφήνουν ορθάνοιχτα, όμως, το δρόμο της απερίγραπτης, περιπετειώδης σιωπής.

Ώστε αυτό είναι το ξακουστό αίσθημα που, για χρόνια περιγράφουν, για χρόνια με αυτό δημιουργούν, αυτό τους δίνει ελπίδα και γι'αυτό, πλέον ,ζούν.

Ποιός ξέρει πόσος χρόνος μας απομένει;

Σ'αυτή τη ζωή όλο κάτι μας περιμένει.

Όταν περάσουν τα χρόνια και αντικρίσουμε την αλήθεια,

γεμάτοι εμπειρίες, πόνους, νοσταλγίες-προμήθεια,

θυμήσου τα πρώτα μου λόγια.Σε παρακαλώ..μη με ξεχάσεις,

Μεγάλη, ήρθε η ώρα που μ'αφήνεις..ήρθε η ώρα να αποδράσεις.

Thoughts

How can you cry over someone you have never met?
How can you feel so much regret?
How can you love someone then see them going up the stairs?
Knowing,somehow,it was your very last farewell?
Why do you miss something once it's gone?
Is everyone this lonesome?
Education is the future,education is the key
Do I just repeat it or do I literally agree?
Love conquers all,love helps you through the quest
Fight for your love,fight for what gives advantage to the rest
These years are passing,my childhood seems distant
Where am I going?Is it normal to be this hesitant?
So many thoughts form a soliloquy
Are you really you?Am I really me?
But wait,wait just one moment,the real question is : are you free?
(I haven't written a blog in ages.I have no idea why.Might have been blogger's block?hehe..but yeah,here's a poem I wrote quite a while ago.I hadn't completed a poem in two years.It has a different interpretation to every person.Enjoy,peeps)

First day of summer

Woke up at around 20 to six-ish and watched some episodes of ‘The L Word’.Then,I remembered to have breakfast.Did so many things throughout the day:

• Sorted out and threw some scrap paper and books that were invading my desk.
• Fed my cats(when one of them,Senio,comes into contact with meat,he takes it away from the others and makes this ‘grrr’ sound.It’s hilarious).
• Helped my brother and grandpa load wood onto his truck and unload it on the other side of our farm(yeah,man,I live on a farm,burnnn haha :P).
• Cleaned up little bits of wood and dust off my grandpa’s truck.While my grandpa had the ‘reverse’ gear,my brother was telling him to drive slowly and carefully.At one point my grandpa hit this metal door and broke his right back light.Once it happened me and my brother got shocked but then started giggling.Then,my grandpa was like : Simon,why didn’t you tell me to stop? Simon: I told you!You weren’t listening!*slightly laughs*.
• Cleaned up little bits of wood at our BBQ area.
• Washed a car with my brother.During the act of doing so,I asked him if he felt like Jessica Simpson(we were washing it with soapy water and sponges) and he said : I always feel like Jessica Simpson.Me : Hahahahahahah
• Played with with my little kittens(which,my family and I thought went missing.Turns out that their mother placed them deeper into this other area).I wanted to take a picture of them because they looked very adorable when they were sleeping.
• Moved a couple of things out of my bedroom and into our basement area
• Swept some pieces of grass whilst listening to System Of A Down and Scars On Broadway.I think I was singing too loudly and realized it because my cats were looking at me in a weird way.

• Washed the dishes.

• Placed some photographs in their old albums where they originally were taken from.There were so many so I felt relieved for doing so.I miss those years very much.
• Got an injection.It hurt.But not as much as the first two times for the specific injection.
• Washed another car.Before doing so,I felt very lazy.My twin sister was supposed to help me but she stayed inside because she wanted to watch the last twenty minutes of this overly exaggerated Greek series xD
• Watched ‘10 Things I Hate About You’ with my twin sister.We ‘awed’ so much.The guy that starred in ‘500 Days Of Summer’ was in it,too.It reminded me that today was summer and I felt happy(random hahah).It’s a shame that Heath Ledger is dead.He seemed like an excellent actor and person.

I realize that this list is pretty huge.I like having days like these,though.They seem more creative.So yeah,there’s the first day of summer for you.Oh,Greece beat Nigeria in football today.Woo for Greek football players!

Listening to this radio station at the moment called ‘Peripou Radio’.It’s freaking awesome.I don’t really listen to the radio because most of the stations don’t play music I prefer(or hardly any of the music I prefer).So yeah,it’s cool that there’s a radio like this one.

Here's today for you

Woke up,got dressed,ate breakfast(toast-yum!),fed my five cats,took out the garbage,laughed loads with my twin sister and brother,went to school and had an essay exam(which I did pretty well on,might I add).Afterward,I went to town with my twin sister to see this pair of shoes that she's absolutely crazy about.She wanted to take a picture of them in order to show them to her boyfriend and she was scared to at the beginning.It was quite funny because she'd hold up her camera to take a snapshot and then the lady on the inside would sort of turn and look outside(she didn't realize what she was doing,thankfull).The funny part was that she said : Marilena,take the picture!I was like : no..!:S(she was the one who wanted me to come with her to do so in the first place haha).It was really funny,though.I'm smiling right now just at the thought of it.
Came home,sorted out some scrap paper that was on my desk,ate this delicious mix of eggplant,onion and tomato in the oven while watching 'Hannah Montana' with my twin sister and started gathering all the necessities in order to wash our car.My grandpa was sitting at this table that we have in our garden.While I was filling up this soap filled mop bucket,he called me and I understood that he wanted to give me money.You see,when he wants to give money to his grandchildren,he always gets this really cute tone in his voice;it's as if I can hear his generosity just by the way he talks.Anyway,I filled up the mop bucket(having my back turned to him) and placed it next to the car so I could,eventually,make my way back.He was like : Marilena,come here*gives two ten euro bills for me and my twin sister*.I smiled,sighed and asked him why and his reply made me smile even more : it was my birthday yesterday and I didn't get you guys anything.You guys surprised me with a cake and candle and I didn't get you anything,so there you go.I told him that I know that when someone has a birthday it usually goes the other way round.He laughed and said that he knows it his way.Ahh,I adore moments like those.
So yeah,washed the car with my twin sister.It was so much fun.We laughed,sang along to the songs on the radio,cleaned the car from the inside,too.She wet me a couple of times and I was like ahh hahah.
Talked to a couple of people online and offline.Was good.
In the afternoon,me and my twin sister sat on my bed and talked about so many things.We haven't talked like that in ages.It felt nice.I mean,generally speaking,we're close..but today just felt different.We're so different as people that it awes me when we get along and actually end up enjoying each others company.
Talked to our older sister on Skype.Laughed loads about random stories,people,videos,situations.She's coming on Friday!Can't wait.
Had an awesome day.Hope I have other days like these.

So yeah..here's today

Went to the dietitian’s office today.Got some good results.My pants have become really loose on me!I’m going to go and buy some pants with my mom and twin sister tomorrow morning,after my algebra lesson.

Walked loads,uploaded some cool songs onto my iPod,studied hard,watched a bit of this Greek show with my grandma,twin sister and mom.My grandma is so into the shows she watches.Before one of the shows started,she came in all out of breath(she was gardening,I assume) and asked my mom if the show started in a very eager manner.It was cute.

Made dinner for myself and the others.Salad,croutons,cucumber,mayo,egg and some lemon juice on top.Was immensely delicious haha.

While I was walking down,I saw this grandpa with a camera.While I passed him,I gave him a smile and told him that his camera looked lovely.Once he saw me,he said hello and asked me how I was.I was in a hurry,so I couldn’t actually reply to his question.I was grinning all the way to my algebra lesson.I dunno,in some areas around the world that would seem like a creepy situation to be in;just saying hello to a complete stranger,that is.He genuinely seemed happy that I greeted him,though.I felt good for making him feel that way;even if it was for a little.

I live in a pretty small town with a population that reaches about 30,000 inhabitants.Greeting people that you don’t know over here isn’t weird,though.I do it all the time.You never know what a little greeting or smile might do to make a person’s bad day turn into a decent one.It’s really worth it.